On the cover of this book is a mother leaning over her
unhappy toddler daughter, holding a bottle labeled “LAXATIVE” and a spoon.
Apparently she’s trying to force the little girl to ingest laxative (!)
Ginger
Plowman has no theological training or schooling in child care or
development. She advises whipping with a flexible "rod" to obtain
instant "cheerful" obedience, even infants as young as 10 months old,
even when a child is ill, and for all "little things". Plowman
also approves of hitting puppies, and adults. While Plowman claims her
methods are the only way for Christians, she in fact leaves out all
Jesus's teachings on mercy, love, the Golden Rule, kindness to the
weak, and how children are close to God.
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Here are some quotes from the book. ** Please especially read the quotes in large purple print **
p. 9 In the Acknowledgements at the beginning of the book, Plowman credits baby-whipping authors Tedd Tripp and Roy Lessin for their “insights” and “wisdom” and for helping her “hammer out the differences in worldly spanking versus biblical chastisement.” (Hammer???)
p.11 “And most of all, I thank my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, for granting me the privilege of encouraging mothers across the country.” (Encouraging them to whip their babies??)
p.13 “We mothers can tend to think that after a child’s birth the hard part is over. We endured months of morning sickness, were shocked by the changes pregnancy wrought on our bodies, and even survived the life-threatening delivery process itself. What a surprise it was to learn that the hard part was just beginning!”
p.15 “I am not a parenting expert, and I did not write this book based on my own authority. This book was written on the authority of God’s Word and the expertise of his counsel.”
p.19 “If I have to answer one more insignificant question, wipe one more runny nose, or bandage one more boo-boo today, I’m going to pull out my hair…and maybe also the hair of whoever is standing close by!” “God, is this really what I’m supposed to be doing? I mean, don’t you have something really important for me that requires a little more skill than tying shoes and cutting the crust off sandwiches?”
p.19-20 “Let me back up and tell you about myself before I reached this point in my life. I wasn’t always bordering on the brink of insanity. It wasn’t too long ago that I really had it all together. I successfully managed a booming and well-respected business, counseled others in organizational skills, and drove a pretty cool automobile that would NOT seat an entire soccer team, and me, comfortably. I enjoyed television shows that were not hosted by singing vegetables or a purple dinosaur. I never found the milk in the pantry, and I never experienced the sheer panic of trying to remember whom I was calling before the voice at the other end said, ‘Hello”’ Yesterday, I placed an order by phone. When the sales lady asked me for my address, I had to put her on hold. I absolutely could not recall my own address. It did finally come to me as I was reaching for the phone book to look it up.”
p.27 “When they disobey, we think we have done well to say, ‘That was wrong, and you shouldn’t have done it…(whack, whack, whack) now, get in your room!’ When we do this, we have only done half of what God has called us to do. Certainly God has called us to use the rod to drive foolishness from the hearts of our children.”
p.32 When Plowman’s 3 year old daughter claimed her doll put lipstick on their pet dog, her father was willing to laugh it off. But Plowman hounded the girl, and ordered her to her room where she cried herself to sleep. Then she woke the girl up, and got her to admit she put the lipstick on the dog. Then Plowman hit her: “I wouldn’t trade anything for the freedom she had after receiving her spanking and cleaning out her heart. I don’t think she would either.”
p.49 A little boy, Josh, is spanked for hitting his sister for interrupting him: “Josh, if you would have responded to Lindsey’s sinful tactics with self-control and in a biblical manner, you would not be getting a spanking. Lindsey would be the only one in trouble.” (Sounds like the sister got hit too. Of course they’re learning to hit from their parents!)
Plowman recommends hitting puppies on pages 58-59: spanking_puppies
p.70 “Even if you are tired and hungry it is sinful to slap somebody upside the head!” (But not sinful to slap their buttocks???)
p.71 “Actually, if you could visit my home and see my failures you probably would not have purchased this book.” (!!)
p.73 “We are to help them obey God by requiring them to obey Mom and Dad. If we fail to require obedience from our children, we become a stumbling block for them. Luke 17:2 explains that it would be better for us to drown in the sea with a millstone tied around our necks than to cause a child to stumble. We are robbing our children of the blessings that God intends for them when we fail to require obedience.” (That’s sure a different interpretation!)
p.75 “I view my responsibility as being most like that of John the Baptist. We as parents are given the awesome responsibility of standing in the gap for our children. Before they surrender to the Lordship of God and come under His authority, they are sovereignly under the only authority they know—their parents. This divine era places us in the gap between God and our children. God has called us to be ‘John the Baptist’ for our children.”
p.76 “Your child learns the most not by what he hears you say but by what he sees you do. He will follow many of the examples that you set before him.”
p.84 “You should desire to honor and obey your parents more than you desire to play outside with Jimmy. Son, be careful to not become a lover of pleasure more than you are a lover of God.”
p.86 When small children don’t sit still and stay quiet in church, “by the end of the service, you have already vented a little anger by informing them through clenched teeth of what is going to happen to them when they get home. So, now they are whimpering and whining rather loudly, ‘BUT I DON’T WANT A SPAAAANKIIIIING.’ By the time you get to the foyer, they have completely lost it. They have fallen out on the floor, kicking and screaming, and you are dragging them out by one leg.”
p.87 “Nothing irritates me more than when I am talking to an adult and one of my children interrupts our conversation.”
p.90 When Plowman’s daughter Alex refused “orders” to put on her shoes, Plowman gets furious: “What should I find but Alex, running around on bare feet that had turned a bluish purple color. As if that wasn’t enough to light my fire, her new pants were a little too long for her legs so without her shoes she stepped on them. It may have been cold outside, but the heat building up in Mama at that moment could have warmed the entire neighborhood.”
PART 3 The Biblical Use of the Rod
p.99 This section starts with the caption “The
Tailbone’s Connected to the. . . Heart?”
p.99 “Even some well-respected Christian child psychologists advise against spanking. Certainly, there are homes where the parents spanked and the child grew up with a bent toward violence. However, in most of these cases, the parents had embraced a worldly form of spanking rather than a biblical form of chastisement. They had used the rod without the reproof. They had punished the wrong without explaining the right and most often they had punished in anger and with a wrong motive. Any time parents reject God’s methods and embrace worldly methods, problems will result.”
p.100 “To say, ‘I don’t believe in spanking,’ is to say that God’s ordained methods for child training are wrong. It’s to reject God’s Word. It’s to say you are wiser than God Himself.”
p.100 “What Exactly is the Rod? Tedd Tripp defines using the rod as ‘A parent, in faith toward God and faithfulness toward his or her children, undertaking the responsibility of careful, timely, measured and controlled use of physical punishment to underscore the importance of obeying God, thus rescuing the child from continuing in his foolishness until death.’” “Spanking is part of God’s ordained method for driving the foolishness out of the hearts of our children.”
p.104 “We shouldn’t be surprised that worldly methods and false philosophies are taught by secular ‘experts.’ However, we must learn to discern the difference between the wisdom of the world and the wisdom of God.”
p.108 “The use of the rod demonstrates faithfulness to
God. To heed God’s commands in using the rod is to fully rely upon His
wisdom and to faithfully trust in His counsel.
The use of the rod demonstrates faithfulness toward the
child. Parents who refuse to spank are doing their children a spiritual
injustice. Not to spank is to be unfaithful to the soul of the child.
The use of the rod imparts wisdom. It humbles the
heart of the child and drives out the foolishness that is bound up there.”
p.109 “The Rod is a Responsibility When parents administer the rod they are not merely punishing their children. They are obeying the responsibility that God has given them. The rod is somewhat of a mystery in how it works but we can be confident that while we are obeying God and working on the buttocks, God is honoring our obedience and working on the heart. Therefore, if you are going to rescue your child from death, if you are going to uproot and drive the foolishness out of his heart, and if you are going to impart wisdom, you must use the rod.”
p.110 “To purposely inflict pain on your child is a hard thing to do. But it is worldly thinking that says, ‘I just love him too much to spank him.’ Ask yourself this question: Who benefits from your decision to not spank your child? Certainly not the child.”
p.110 “I’ve had moms ask me when is it okay to slap their baby’s hand for disobeying and touching something that is off limits. The answer should be obvious. When they disobey and touch something that is off limits. If they are old enough to disobey then they are old enough to be trained to obey.”
p.111 Plowman approves of hitting a 10 month old baby: “She pushed herself to a half-stand in the seat; I said, ‘No, Della, don’t stand in your chair,’ and sat her down. She promptly sprang back up so I popped her diapered behind and said, ‘No! Sit down.’ She looked confused, eased down, then back up, watching me, thought better of it, sat back down, and never gave us another problem about standing in her high chair. This example certainly proves that a ten-month-old is capable of learning the meaning of the word ‘No.’”
p.112 Hit them even when they’re sick: “The Bible does not say that children should be trained to obey except when they are sick. God’s Word is always the same. If your child has a fever, a runny nose, or a tummy ache, ‘Yes’ still means ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ still means ‘No.’”
p.112 “It may be too late to correct Uncle Tom’s temper with the rod, (although I do think there are many adults who could benefit from a good old fashioned ‘whippin,’ as we say in Alabama) but it’s not too late for your child.”
p.113 “The rod of correction returns the child to a place of submission to his parents, a place where God has promised blessing.”
p.114 “The mom who is consistent and does not allow the child to challenge her authority will experience intimacy with her child. But when he is allowed to be sullen and disobedient, spanking will hinder closeness. The parent who is consistent in requiring obedience keeps the relationship in balance. This parent will enjoy a close and open relationship with the child.”
p.114 “The purpose of a spanking is to inflict pain. If little Johnny is sporting an extra padded diaper and running in circles while Mom half-heartedly administers the rod, the spanking is ineffective.”
p.117 “We should expect instant obedience from our children. As soon as my children could talk, I would ask them, ‘How does God want you to obey?’ They would respond, ‘All the way, right away, and with a happy heart.’”
p.118 “Delayed obedience is disobedience. A child should be trained to respond promptly the first time the parent gives a command. Instant obedience should be the standard, and children should be expected to abide by that standard. We should reinforce that expectation with the rod each and every time they fail to obey.”
p.119 “If a child is obeying with a wrong attitude, he is not obeying in a way that pleases God. A child who obeys outwardly but is inwardly angry because he didn’t get his own way is a child who is not truly happy. When Wesley (her son) was younger, I can say with certainty that he had more spankings for disobeying with his attitude than for direct disobedience.”
p.121 “Beware of letting small faults pass unnoticed under the idea it is a little one. There are no little things in training children; all are important.”
p.123 “A good spanking at the end of the day can never make up for the spankings that should have been administered throughout the day."
In this book there are many verses from the Bible, especially from Proverbs of course. Very little from the Gospels, no “Golden Rule” or Jesus’ words on how children are close to God, or how we should be merciful, and peacemakers, and help “the least of these”. Punish and accusations and guilt…it’s a method to seriously mess up a child for life.
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